VN Ren'Py Abandoned Beginnings [v0.12] [Zyzonia]

4.60 star(s) 5 Votes
Discussion Reviews (5)
7767

7767

EAT
Uploader
Aug 5, 2016
1,033
123,216
Begg_Ban.png

Overview:
Beginning another life Is about you, the protagonist. Being thrown out from home with a past that is not completely clear. While you are rich, that wont make your life easier. Instead you will be thrown into the high society treading paths between being used and using people.
Who will you become?
A naive boy that gets stringed along from the shadows, or a dominating businesses man who rules the city?
Or maybe. You just want to find the love of your life?
​
Thread Updated: 2020-06-24
Release Date: 2019-10-06
Developer: Zyzonia
You must be registered to see the links
-
You must be registered to see the links

Censored: No
Version: 0.12
OS: Windows, Linux, Mac
Language: English
Genre:
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.

Installation:
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.

Changelog:
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.

DOWNLOAD
Win/Linux:
You must be registered to see the links
-
You must be registered to see the links
-
You must be registered to see the links

Mac:
You must be registered to see the links
-
You must be registered to see the links
-
You must be registered to see the links

Android:
You must be registered to see the links
-
You must be registered to see the links
-
You must be registered to see the links

Others: COMPRESSED*

Patches:
You must be registered to see the links

Extras:
You must be registered to see the links


Animations
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
*This unofficial port/version is not released by developer, download at your own risk.
002.PNG 008.PNG 142.jpg 287.jpg 520.jpg 731.jpg 772.jpg 794.jpg ​
 
Last edited by a moderator:
  • Like
  • Sad
  • Thinking Face
Reactions: Dharok, Rali77, 2382dudubes and 155 others
JohnJG

JohnJG

Engaged Member
May 17, 2018
2,424
2,743
It sounds like a very intriguing premise. I like it.

I'm looking forward to downloading and giving it a go. (y) :coffee:
 
Darkmetal

Darkmetal

Well-Known Member
Jul 6, 2019
1,106
14,312
BranTheBrokenDick said:
So it begins...
Click to expand...
"...no, now it ends." Sincerely, your dad Ned Stark. :LOL:
You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
The English in the description worries me a bit, but I like games that seems to offer a villain path "to rule the city" so I'll give it a try.

EDIT- Feb 2021: I see the game has now been marked as abandoned. This is a shame, it's a good game that's pretty ambitious with the choices it provides the player.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
  • Haha
  • Angry
Reactions: Imperial of Darkness 69, Default123x, tomwheeler and 10 others
ThunderRob

ThunderRob

Devoted Member
May 10, 2018
9,497
26,651
Ok..heres the thing..the game is interesting..if it is engrish..it is barely noticeable..BUT..it is now the KING of really REALLY bad spelling..i mean..this is EPIC next level bad spelling...this is the spelling..that literally creates grammar nazi's..this is how they are born..they pop out of the womb en masse when spelling like this appears :D otherwise..like i said..it is an interesting game so far...
Proofreader needed on aisle 5!!!and 6..7..8 and 9!!!
 
  • Like
  • Haha
  • Angry
Reactions: Robert Monotoli, UselessSphinx, Eddie Vallient and 20 others
Korentin

Korentin

Member
Game Developer
May 20, 2019
156
323
Yeah... thanks for sharing but try to get some help with proofreading and editing. Looking through the script this isn't for me but some people might like it :)

playb0y44 Should probably add Blackmail tag.
 
Last edited:
  • Like
Reactions: Eddie Vallient
olafdark

olafdark

Newbie
Mar 19, 2019
21
38
woj_tec said:
I think only native have problem with that... Others think by reading... :)
Click to expand...
With so many missing capitals in first words in sentences, one might be wondering - is it laziness, or was his/her other hand busy with something else than hitting SHIFT? :)
Anyway, after decipherment the story is not bad at all.
 
  • Like
Reactions: AL7Sexy
Dipsode

Dipsode

Member
Aug 12, 2017
240
299
Many words for little, many misspellings, abbreviations.... Even me, who doesn't care engrish, it bothers me!
Not many pictures (at least at first, I gave up pretty quickly) and quite dark. 47 clicks on the same images with texts! o_O
All this gives a little bit of an impression, that in fact, the author doesn't give a damn about the player... :rolleyes:
But all this can probably be improved quite easily...
A little more courage and good luck ;):coffee:
 
  • Wow
Reactions: Robert Monotoli and Canto Forte
botc76

botc76

The Crawling Chaos, Bringer of Strange Joy
Donor
Oct 23, 2016
4,519
13,537
woj_tec said:
I think only native have problem with that... Others think by reading... :)
Click to expand...
Not really, no. Anybody whose English is passable has a problem with Engrish. I for one am completely sick of it and will steer far from any game that has it.

Speaking of...

ThunderRob said:
Ok..heres the thing..the game is interesting..if it is engrish..it is barely noticeable..BUT..it is now the KING of really REALLY bad spelling..i mean..this is EPIC next level bad spelling...this is the spelling..that literally creates grammar nazi's..this is how they are born..they pop out of the womb en masse when spelling like this appears :D otherwise..like i said..it is an interesting game so far...
Proofreader needed on aisle 5!!!and 6..7..8 and 9!!!
Click to expand...
Some games have lately shown me that this kind of laziness by a dev can be very irritating for me. I'm not a grammar nazi for now, but I do begin to understand them a bit better.
 
  • Like
Reactions: ampera899, SoiCowboy, Minengeschoss and 3 others
L7Bear

L7Bear

Well-Known Member
May 29, 2017
1,062
1,719
Lots of potential, lots of problems.
The basic concept seems interesting and the artwork looks good, but desperately needs an editor/proofreader.

You don't have permission to view the spoiler content. Log in or register now.
 
  • Like
Reactions: Minengeschoss and Trasher2018
woj_tec

woj_tec

Member
Oct 10, 2017
433
171
olafdark said:
With so many missing capitals in first words in sentences, one might be wondering - is it laziness, or was his/her other hand busy with something else than hitting SHIFT? :)
Anyway, after decipherment the story is not bad at all.
Click to expand...
I have more than 20 years spoke mix: english, italian, german, polish, russian... Missing capitals is better than missing mind...
 
Trasher2018

Trasher2018

Engaged Member
Aug 21, 2018
2,193
3,590
woj_tec said:
I have more than 20 years spoke mix: english, italian, german, polish, russian... Missing capitals is better than missing mind...
Click to expand...
That is not en excuse for lazy writing or incompetence. As soon as there is a Patreon page, the dev want to earn some money. And when you want some money, you have to put in work into your project.

Maybe I should make a game in Latin and all the ppl have to learn Latin to play and pay me for my effort, that I helped them to learn a new language!

It's ok to have SOME spelling errors, but there should be a strife to perfection when you want to earn money with something.

I am not a native speaker for English and just have my school English and many years on the internet for that. But you can use auto correction for your writing, even in a forum like this. And I assume that the dev uses some kind of text editor (Open Office or Google Write ...) to write and then he will have English corrections.
 
  • Like
Reactions: ampera899, Elbo, robin1970 and 1 other person
D

darlic

Well-Known Member
Feb 27, 2017
1,928
3,254
Boring tags ✔
Meaningless preview images ✔
Buggy release ✔

How about no... :confused:
 
  • Like
Reactions: Hyped
monksims

monksims

Active Member
Mar 17, 2019
534
566
Yeah, all lower case writing without almost any punctuation makes text so much harder to understand. Here's an example of a simple screen that I had to read three times in order to insert some punctuation in my head:
the true problem was that mother left voluntarily and didn't want anything to do with us maybe she was indeed a "gold digger" like father said
Click to expand...
With some punctuation and a couple of capital letters it transforms to:
The true problem was that mother left voluntarily. She didn't want anything to do with us. Maybe she was indeed a "gold digger" like father said...
Click to expand...
It's much more readable and if writing is good the story becomes another character. Also, punctuation gives you opportunities to take a breath when you read the text aloud. I didn't have enough breath to get through the all lower case text but I didn't have any problems with punctuated text.

Please, punctuate and use capital letters where needed.
 
  • Like
Reactions: MoreLinks, zyzonia and mysterious stranger
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top Bottom
4.60 star(s) 5 Votes